What happens when a humble disciple hears Bhagavatam from a bonafide spiritual master

SB: Canto: 1 Chapter 18, Verse # 3:
Translation:
Furthermore, after leaving all his associates, the King surrendered himself as a disciple to the son of Vyāsa [Śukadeva Gosvāmī], and thus he was able to understand the actual position of the Personality of Godhead.
Purport:
The word ajita is significant here. The Personality of Godhead, Śrī Kṛṣṇa, is known as Ajita, or unconquerable, and He is so in every respect. No one can know His actual position. He is unconquerable by knowledge also. We have heard about His dhāma, or place, eternal Goloka Vṛndāvana, but there are many scholars who interpret this abode in different ways. But by the grace of a spiritual master like Śukadeva Gosvāmī, unto whom the King gave himself up as a most humble disciple, one is able to understand the actual position of the Lord, His eternal abode, and His transcendental paraphernalia in that dhāma, or abode. Knowing the transcendental position of the Lord and the transcendental method by which one can approach that transcendental dhāma, the King was confident about his ultimate destination, and by knowing this he could leave aside everything material, even his own body, without any difficulty of attachment. In the Bhagavad-gītā, it is stated, paraḿ dṛṣṭvā nivartate: one can give up all connection with material attachment when one is able to see the param, or the superior quality of things. From Bhagavad-gītā we understand the quality of the Lord's energy that is superior to the material quality of energy, and by the grace of a bona fide spiritual master like Śukadeva Gosvāmī, it is quite possible to know everything of the superior energy of the Lord by which the Lord manifests His eternal name, quality, pastimes, paraphernalia and variegatedness. Unless one thoroughly understands this superior or eternal energy of the Lord, it is not possible to leave the material energy, however one may theoretically speculate on the true nature of the Absolute Truth. By the grace of Lord Kṛṣṇa, Mahārāja Parīkṣit was able to receive the mercy of such a personality as Śukadeva Gosvāmī, and thus he was able to know the actual position of the unconquerable Lord. It is very difficult to find the Lord from the Vedic literatures, but it is very easy to know Him by the mercy of a liberated devotee like Śukadeva Gosvāmī.
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When a sincere disciple like Maharaj Parikshit humble surrenders himself unto the lotus of spiritual master like Srila Sukadeva Goswami and hears from him, as Maharaj Parikhit heard from Srila Sukadeva Goswami, disciple could understand the actual position of the Lord and His abode. He is also revealed by the mercy of spiritual master, not by one's own speculative mind because Lord is ajita, how to approach that supreme abode of the Lord. This transcendental knowledge instills so much confidence in the heart of the disciple about his ultimate destination that he could leave aside everything material without any difficulty of attachment.
Such detachment from the material energy is only possible when disciple has thorough understanding of the superior energy of the Lord. No amount of speculation about the absolute truth can substitute this. By speculation, neither one can detach himself from material energy nor can one understand the Lord's superior energy. Detachment comes when there is clear understanding which can only be imparted by a bonafide spiritual master.
My understanding of the word 'confidence' talked of in the purport: Confidence means a sense of security and freedom from feelings of insecurity. We take nice care of the body because we believe that when body is safe'n'secure and taken care of then 'happy I am'. That's why we are attached to body. We are attached to eating nice stuffs but not to poison because we know that the former makes me happy but latter can cause me severe problems. So whatever gives us a sense of happiness, although illusory, we become attached to it (ananda mayo'bhyasat). So, coming back to original discussion about confidence, whenever the interests of the body are threatened we feel insecure. Example: loosing a job makes us insecure, for a student performing bad in the exams makes him insecure. But in reality attachment to anything material is potentially a source of misery, then how can attachment to body be a source of happiness. By transcendental knowledge we can clearly see the reality and come to conclusion that material things are incapable of securing us or giving us happiness. Our only security lies with serving and pleasing the Lord. And when this knowledge is thoroughly and firmly established within a disciple's heart, only then he is no more attached to the things of this world. Thus, he becomes fearless at the time of death.

Controlling Senses by Devotional Service

SB:1.10.23:
Lord's transcendenatal form is perceived by those who have purified their mind of all material consciousness by dint of rigid devotional service and fully controlling their life and senses.
       - Senses can't be artificially controlled. Eg: Vishvamitra Muni. They need engagement. Devotees, by engaging the active senses in the devotional service, prevent them from being allured by inferior engagements. BG also confirms : Senses can be controlled by only better engaements. This is the only and easiest means of sense control.
       - Sense control is possible only when mind is freed from material desires arising from material consciousness. Anything engaged in devotional service is purified of material contamination. Material contamination is due to ignorance only. To one engaged in serving the Lord, by His grace all factual knowledge is revealed within the heart and thus, the darkness of ignorance is dissipated.

So devotional service not only necessitates engaging the senses in the service of the Lord but also purifies them of material nature. By serving Hrshikesa, the master of senses, senses are spiritualized and then one can attain liberation.

For Your Pleasure

Krsna always contemplates on pleasing His devotees, that's why He is always blissful! HG RadheyShyam Pr, in a recent lecture, was discussing Lord's reciprocation with His pure devotee Bhishma Deva. He spoke of incidences where Lord is acting to bestow transcendental joy upon him.

After the battle of Kurukshetra, Yudhishthir Maharaj was lamenting for the massacre that took place in the battlefield and blaming himself. He was thinking that due to his greed to acquire the throne of Hastinapur, he has caused so many women go widows, children fatherless and old people have been rendered without any support. Lord personally tried to pacify him, great sages like Vyasa Deva spoke Shastras, but to no avail. Lord then desired that Yudhishthir Maharaj accompanied by brothers should visit their grand-father, Bhishma Deva because he was on his death bed. It was Lord's desire that Bhishma speak to Yudhishthir Maharaj about religious principles and pacify him. When Bhishma deva spoke to Pandavas, headed by Yudhishthir, he was immediately relieved of all his lamentation. Thus, Lord glorified the excellence of His devotee in subtle knowledge.

Before coming to meet Bhishma Lord asked Pandavas to dress themselves very opulently and ride on golden chariots. Although coronation ceremony had not been done yet but they all adorned beautiful crowns and came in front of their grand father. Bhishma Deva was most affectionate to the sons of Pandu and pained at heart to see them suffer terribly at the hands of envious Duryodhana. Understanding his desire to see them in royal attire at the last moments of his life, Lord instructed Pandavas thus.

Bhishma prayed to the Lord as he was lying on the bed of arrows and expressed his gratitude to the Lord for being present before him at those moments. Lord's devotees always want to behold His beautiful form. Bhishma Deva also desired to see His four handed Vishnu form. Fixing his eyes on the beautiful form of the Lord, he submerged his mind in continous remembrance of Lord's pastimes. Lord thus, fulfilled his heart's desire by being personally present before him.

Most of the prayers are glorifying the exchange of love between Lord and His devotee in chivalrous humor. Lord's body is transcendental. His body and soul are one and the same. However, on the battlefield, to reciprocate with the love of Bhishma Deva Lord manifests wounds and blood on His body. Lord breaks His own vow to protect Arjuna and fulfill the words of Bhishma Deva.

Krsna, to protect Arjuna, picks up the chariot wheel and runs towards Bhishma Deva thereby breaking His own vow. Lord has inconceivable potency. He could have protected Arjuna without breaking lifting that wheel. But Lord forsakes His own vow to fulfill the desires of Bhishma Deva. Moreover, Lord did not invoke Sudarshan rather picked up a chariot wheel just to intensify the rasa.

Bhishma Deva relished witnessing the beautiful Partha-Sarathi form of the Lord which even Arjuna could not witness because he was standing behind the Lord whereas Bhishma deva was in the front. SP writes, "..Bhīṣmadeva never forgot the beautiful feature of the Lord as Pārtha-sārathi, which even Arjuna could not see. Arjuna was behind the beautiful Pārtha-sārathi while Bhīṣmadeva was just in front of the Lord. As far as the military feature of the Lord is concerned, Bhīṣmadeva observed this with more relish than Arjuna..."


Joy of heart is derived from helping and pleasing others. When we contemplate on pleasing others then we'll be happy. There is the real juice. Attitude of pleasing others has been exemplified by Lord all the time. Krsna to please Vrajavasis went to the extent of becoming a small baby and being dragged by calves in the dust of Vrndavana. I can tell from personal experience, a life of selfishness, putting one's own needs infront of everybody else, is the most miserable life because we endeavor with a hope to be happy but it does not satisfy. Just frustrating. Therefore I find great inspiration from the following realization of HH Radhanath Swami Maharaj as he shares it in his book,
"To please others is not always easy, but it is part of my deepest nature to wish to do so."
http://www.radhanath-swami.net/inconveniences-for-pleasing-others/personal-inconveniences-pleasing


SB:1.9.34: "On the battlefield [where Śrī Kṛṣṇa attended Arjuna out of friendship], the flowing hair of Lord Kṛṣṇa turned ashen due to the dust raised by the hoofs of the horses. And because of His labor, beads of sweat wetted His face. All these decorations, intensified by the wounds dealt by my sharp arrows, were enjoyed by Him. Let my mind thus go unto Śrī Kṛṣṇa."

Real Relatioships

While contemplating on the emphasis given on putting Krsna in the center of every relationship and other related ideas, following arguments came across.

Relationships can satisfy heart's innermost desire to be loved and to give love. To the extent a relationship is based on foundations of selfless service and willingness to sacrifice instead of squeezing out pleasure for oneself, to that extent it is nourishing to one's soul. Radhanath Swami Maharaj writes in his book, 'Journey Home' www.thejourneyhomebook.com, it is part of the deepest nature of every soul to please others. Service rendered with care, love and for the pleasure of beloved should be the foundation, if the relationship has to last long. In this world we see the epitome of this in the relationship between mother and son. Mother while changing nappies at midnight does not have any expectations from her little baby. It is love of mother for her child expressed through service without any expectations. Love means to think, speak and act in a way that is pleasing to other. When we think of love as a means of gratifying our own mind and senses and false ego, it is lust. For instance, love between a man and woman based on bodily features does not last long because factually it is lust devoid of any sense of love. It can never give us satisfaction because lust can only cater to the demands of senses which are dead matter. On contrary, we are a living force, we need love to be happy. So the barometer of love in any relatioship is the ratio of willingness to sacrifice for the pleasure of beloved to the selfish expectations we have from beloved. More the love, long lasting and satisfying will be the relationship.

Having understood the need to render service, theory is incomplete if we do not identify the object of our service. Mother unconditionally loves her children but in ignorance of spiritual reality that love remains on bodily platform which causes attachment and leads to material bondage. Ajamila was helplessly  attached to his youngest son. As a result, at death bed he could only think of him. Not just mental thinking but he was strongly remembering his son and crying out to him for shelter. By the will of providence he named his son Narayana and therefore got the benefit of chanting Lord's holynames. If he would have had this same attachment to Lord, rememberance of Lord and cried out to the Supreme Personality then the purpose of human life was fulfilled. This is the point:
Ajamila who was destined to live in hell for millions of years for his sins reaped so much eternal benefit because he unconsciously somehow involved Lord Narayana in his relationship with his son. Then what to speak of Lord's devotees who plan and diligently centre every relationship around Lord. What will be their destination? Very similar to pastime of Putana.

In BG, Krsna proclaims: 'bhoktarama yajnatapasam...'. He is the supreme enjoyer. Any desire to enjoy separate from Him is lust. Therefore, any relationship devoid of an attitude of serving and pleasing the Lord betrays our tendency to enjoy that relationship without Him. Therefore, love between mother and child on material platform is not love in absolute sense because that love diverts our attention away from Krsna, is temporary and gives only a glimpse of satisfaction. However, when parents serve their child or child serves his parents because they are also parts and parcels of the same Lord and that Lord wants us to help each other come closer to Him, then such a relationship will cause liberation. Krsna is our factual father, forgeeting Whom we are entangled in miserable cycle of birth, death, old age and disease.

Srila Prabhupada writes in 'Prayers of Queen Kunti' purport (SB:1.8.42), "The skin relation is the cause of material bondage, but the relation of the soul is the cause of freedom. This relation of the soul to the soul can be established by the via medium of the relation with the Supersoul. Seeing in the darkness is not seeing. But seeing by the light of the sun means to see the sun and everything else which was unseen in the darkness. That is the way of devotional service." That's what Kunti Maharani prayed for.

Pleasures of Material World

Loving relationships alone can satisfy our hearts. No amount of wealth, power, strength, prestige can satisfy us to the extent relationships can. Subtle material opulence give very superficial satisfaction. Soul sitted in the heart is not deriving any joy from the profit, prestige and adoration. In fact, Radhanath Swami Maharaj says, "Desire for profit, prestige and adoration (puja, labha, pratishtha) is perverted reflection of our hankering for love. We think that these things of the material world can give us the love that we all are looking for." What to speak of gross material opulence. Maharaj narrates a personal instance wherein he goes to meet a very wealthy person. He describes various attributes of him - He has palatial house, chandeliers, statues from different countries, every sitting place is like that for a king etc... and his servants dress more opulently than CEOs of many companies !! But that man has boil on his foot and its not going away. That person is in total distress and complete anguish just because of that single boil. He complains, "I have paid thousands of rupees to many doctors but they are not able to do away with this boil. I am willing to exchange it for anything, Anything!"  This is what I can remember, to read detailed version visit:

http://radhanathswamionline.com/nature/oh-my-toe/

Nevertheless, message is clear - nature of this material world is that if you have slightest discomfort, you can not enjoy no matter whatever amount of pleasures you may amass. And distresses or miseries will come because Krsna Himself has certified this. Citraketu Maharaj is another famous example. That's why Prahlad Maharaj advises, "If you want to be happy in this world, do not try to be happy." We have observed ourselves that whatever plan we make to enjoy, sooner or later, by inconceivable time they are shattered. We hanker for things, we invest time, energy and intelligence in attaining them. We struggle so hard amidst all difficulties for few moments of pleasure. But we are left with more hankering and lamentation - hardly any satisfaction is there in the end. Just like a thirsty person in desert is offered only few drops of water. So in short:
- Sufferings dominate pleasures in the material world
- Pleasures of this world are temporary and therefore can not fully satisfy us
- For acquiring one moment of sense gratification, hundreds of moments are spent in anxiety, uncertainty, fear, anguish and distress - all pathetic situations.


Therefore, Krsna says in BG that we are in illusion thinking that sensory pleasures of the body can satisfy us. Even worse is that we do not give up this false hope despite realizations. A child gives up a toffee for a chocolate. Similarly if we taste the sweetness of loving devotional relationship with the Lord Who is eternally blissful and resrvoir of all pleasures - Whose every aspect is madhura, we can easily give up the lowly attractions of the dead matter. Most appropriate example is of Srila Hari Das Thakur. He was not even slightest bit disturbed by the approaches of the most beautiful prostitute because he was tasting the sweetness of the holy names of the Lord. With such devotion, love and humility he was chanting that Krsna reciprocated and satisfied him completely. That's wonderful - no hankering and no anxiety and no lamentation, only bliss. May we also remember Krsna, our eternal father and our best well wishing friend, with the same loving devotion as Hari Das Thakur did. May he bless us with the same humble attitude, tolerant desposition and genuine compassion required to chant Lord's holynames feelingly.

Greatest illusion

Kunti Maharani prayed to Lord to sever the tough knot of affectionate family ties. She prayed that let her affection continuously flow towards Krsna without any diversion or hindrance just like Ganges is always flowing towards sea without any impediment. In a recorded class by HH Radhanath Swami that was being played today, Maharaj said that family life not based on the principle of serving the Lord is the greatest illusion.

Affection for family members based on skin is disastrous for one's spiritual advancement. Family has the potential to divert our loving propensities away from Krsna. The relationships with father, mother, husband, wife, children, brother, sister etc, if not conducted in full knowledge of Lord, jiva, prakrti and their mutual relationships then, as per Prahlad Maharaj, family life is a deep dark well. Even if one cries out for help nobody can do anything. When we are overwhelmed by bodily conception being ignorant of our spiritual identity, we start thinking in terms of 'I', 'me' and 'mine' - 'I am this body and persons or objects in relation to this body are mine. They will support me and give me protection at the time of calamity.' We repose our faith and love, originally meant for Krsna, in our near and dear ones. This leads to attachment that only binds us to this material world more and more. Through out our life, in our relatives, we always looked for shelter - emotional, physical and mental. We knew nobody but them. But at the time of death remembering the 'fallible soldiers of this world' would only frustrate us and guarantee another birth in the material world because of our love for material opulence and unflinching faith in them. Having a prosperous family life is indeed, a material opulence.

Pastime of Gajendra's deliverance says it all. It serves as an incredible case study. He was the king of the forest. But when he got caught in the jaws of inevitable crocodile none of his family members nor his own strength could help him. They only caused him more and more frustration at the time when he needed them most. But because he remembered Lord, due to previous life's credits, Lord saved him. Gajendra was a great devotee in his previous life - so he could remember. But if we want to remember the Lord at the time of death which is the only means of salvation, then we have to practise right from now. We can not afford to take shelter of our family for the time being and postpone surrender to Krsna up until the death because death can come at any moment.

Putting in nutshell my humble realizations on 'Why saintly persons condemn grha-medhi life': Family life based on bodily concept and enjoying mentality, diverts our attention away from Krsna in an unparalleled way. Maharaj says, "Its a hard knot that keeps us always in illusion." We go on entangling ourselves in complicated relationships for want of security and gratification. Prabhupada remarks that bodily relations are illusion because they are due to the influence of external energy.

What is the ante dote? Solution is the example of Srila Bhakti Vinod Thakur. In his song he sings that when he would come home he would hear bhajans and see that whole family is engaged in devotional service of the Lord. Thus, his home would appear non different from spiritual abode, Vaikuntha. One who helps us remember Krsna is our real well-wisher and true friend. Somehow or other we have to increase our favourable remembrance of the Lord.

Krsna is Impartial

When Krsna appears in this world, He gives pleasure to His devotees, annihilates demons and establishes the religious principles. In the battle of Kurukshetra and before He always protected Pandavas, His devotees. Without His support they could have never been victorious over powerful Kurus.
This episode may lead to conclusion that Krsna is partial towards His devotees.

But Kunti maharani prays:
"My Lord, I consider Your Lordship to be eternal time, the supreme controller, without beginning and end, the all-pervasive one. In distributing Your mercy, You are equal to everyone. The dissensions between living beings are due to social intercourse." (1.8.28)
"O Lord, no one can understand Your transcendental pastimes, which appear to be human and are so misleading. You have no specific object of favor, nor do You have any object of envy. People only imagine that You are partial." (1.8.29)

Prabhupada compares the mercy of Lord to sun rays. Just like sun does not discriminate in distributing its light and its rays are all pervading. Lord's mercy and love is not only for a certain section of people. Every living entity is an eternal part and parcel of Supreme Being. Every jiva is a son of God. However, apparent partiality is due to the difference in receptacles. Pure devotee of the Lord is cent per cent surrendered unto Him, therefore all the love and protection of the Lord is available for such a fortunate soul. People consider the path of bhakti as the path of flattery. There is a significant difference. In flattery there is an expectation of something in return but bhakti means the devotee has no expectations whatsoever. He is serving the Lord only for His pleasure which is the constitutional position of every living being. He is unmotivated and selfless. To such a surrendered pure soul, Krsna gives Himself not just love. There are others like suffering and needy men, inquisitive persons or philosophers who make temporary connections with the Lord to serve a particular purpose. When the purpose is served, there is no more relation with the Lord. They are like those who expose themselves to sun only for some time. So they will receive only partial sunlight. Obstinate people who are envious of Lord and always rebel against His authority, carry a bowl. Ideally that bowl should be upright so that it can be filled with nectar of Lord's love. But they, misusing their free will, keep it upside down. Therefore, Kunti maharani says, "...The dissensions between living beings are due to social intercourse." and "...People only imagine that You are partial." This means people are suffering or enjoying only due to their own karma. They will receive reactions according to their use of free will.

Therefore, natural conclusion is, as put by Prabhupada, "...Such partiality in receiving the Lord's mercy is relative to the recipient, and it is not due to the partiality of the all-merciful Lord." Krsna also says in Bhagavad Gita, "As you shall approach me so shall I reciprocate." and "I envy no one, nor am I partial to anyone. I am equal to all. But whoever renders service unto Me in devotion is a friend, is in Me, and I am also a friend to him." (BG: 9.29)